I’ve read ever since I can remember. From comic books which
I absolutely devoured in my childhood to my Weekly Reader back in Walnut Park
Elementary in Gadsden, Alabama. I have often said that I don’t know how a person who doesn’t read ever forms
a real worldview. Still, that doesn’t mean something is holy or right just
because it gets published. These days the internet has made reading a much
different experience than it was when I was a kid. I’ve actually found myself
now that I’m older reading as if I’m from the internet age instead of the age
of TV sitcoms and variety shows.
These days I read more non fiction than fiction and my
attention span seems to be easily captured by something other than what I’m
doing. I read and listened to an old Robert
Mccammon novel called Swan Song recently. Amazon now allows you to
listen to the audible book while reading an ebook. It even turns the page for
you and honestly with my aging eyesight it’s a good thing. Still, I have just
downloaded the latest Stephen King novel and I’m not doing audible with it. I’m just going to read
it.
In the late 70’s and through the 80’s I would get on the
list to be among the first to borrow the newest Stephen King novel. The smell
and the heft of a new book. The often dark blues and blacks of the cover with
the title written in mid size letter’s such as THE STAND and then under that in
huge letters the name STEPHEN KING. It
was kind of expected after a while that the name of this particular author was
much more of a draw than the actual title of the book. But, I also read lot’s
of other books back then and discovered a wealth of writers that would take me
someplace else. I even started to read a lot in an altered state of consciousness
in my youth. Get a book and a six pack and chill for awhile. Still, I don’t
recommend that . Time goes by quickly and sooner or later you find you need to
earn a living if you intend to keep reading or watching TV or sleeping under a
roof.
Anyway, back then I also discovered authors who wrote about
some far out stuff. Now, UFO’s were the stuff of movies that I sometimes
watched and of course a good scary movie with a ghost or two was also fun. But,
these people were writing in a serious vein about the paranormal. I ate it up.
I discovered authors such as Ruth Montgomery and books about Edgar Cayce and
even Shirley Mcclain went Out on a Limb J
with her name to talk and write about reincarnation.
I then found Raymond Moody and his research into NDE”s which
I found fascinating and hopeful at the same time. But, when I brought it up to
church people it was deemed to be demonic and when asking in a scientific setting
I was told it was woo woo. So, the church where I thought it would be good news
because it spoke of the soul couldn’t accept it because it didn’t fit their
fire and brimstone theology. Then certain gatekeepers of science couldn’t accept
it because it challenged the everything is the brain world view.
The debate rages on today. There is the slowly but surely
weakening of the fundamentalist hold on people and the slowly changing
everything can be explained just by brain chemistry old guard in science. It’s wonderful thing actually but it’s still
a slow go to get to a place of spiritual hope and intellectual honesty.
Two books have influenced me. One made into a movie that was
a Brazilian novel based on a psychic who channeled knowledge called The Astral
City and the other written by Richard Mathewson filmed as a movie starring
Robin Williams called What Dreams May Come. The movie version of Astral City
and the audio book version of What Dreams May Come (although, I liked the movie
too.) had a ring of truth to them. Now, I don’t do guru’s and I’m not looking
for a new religion. But, I did take away some stuff from both works that have
stayed with me. In the Astral City (from what I can remember) the main
character is eating, drinking and smoking and dies and go’s to a dark place
where he is wounded and sleeping and dreaming dark dreams most of the time.
But, he is part of a group soul and has gone to earth for a purpose and some
souls from the city which is a city of light come out into the darkness to
rescue lost souls and they rescue the main character. He’s taken to a hospital
to heal up from his last lifetime and he slowly recovers and is able to join his
group in a home where they live. It’s an interesting movie and I can’t remember
much of it. But, the healing up after a life and the group soul is something
that rings true to me. At the end of the movie there are dark clouds on the
horizon as a world war is starting and the people know they will have a heavy
influx of souls to rescue and bring into the city soon. A female is about to leave the group to go
back to life and it seems as if a male who is close to her decides to go back with
her and he will be her son in this coming life.
What Dreams May Come was written by Richard Mathewson as
according to him a way to relate truth in a readable fictional setting. The
main character dies and tries to reach his wife to assure her he is okay. She
can’t hear him and can’t bring herself to believe he could possibly be
somewhere instead of in oblivion. She pretty much grieves herself to death and
I think if I remember correctly she commits suicide and has to go to a darker
version of her own home where she I s to be trapped for what would be to us a
long, long time. The main character travels from a summerland or very bright environment
and risks his own soul to pass through hellish levels of being to reach her. He
isn’t able to bring her to the summer land area but he does reach her enough to
free her from the house which is a darker replica of her house in life. In the
end he is told that she will have to go through life again and have certain
physical difficulties because she left live via suicide trying to escape her
issues. The main character decides to be reincarnated in the same area so he
can meet her and help her in this life’s journey. He’s told there are no guarantees
and decides he will do it anyway although he could just wait in the spiritual
home in the summer land until she arrives many years later. But, to him in
spirit it would just be a short wait. Still he goes to be with her instead of
waiting. Reincarnation is presented in this book as something that we do but
not the main thing and not the only thing that constitutes an afterlife
experience.
I also came upon another book called Journey to an Afterlife
Time on my Kindle. In this one a man is much like the man in What Dreams May
Come in that he journeys to see his loved ones even though he is in a
comfortable place. The thing that struck me with this one is a road he was
walking on in the afterlife. He would meet people he had known throughout his
life on this road. Stores from his old neighborhood and people he had
relationships with and people he barely knew in his past life. I have always
been fascinated by long winding roads leading to who knows where so I liked
that particular imagery.
So, what really happens when we die? Do we go to an eternal
judgement with an angry deity? Do we reincarnate back to a life depending on
how well we lived the one we just finished? Do we go to a level of heaven or
hell of our own making? Do we simply cease to be? I once saw a Star Trek episode of the Next
Generation. There was an entity in space
who had the crew in his captivity for a little while. This entity was a god
like creature. He asked Captain Picard how he could stand to be a creature with
a very short life span? He asked what happened to humans or creatures such as
the Star Trek crew when they died? The captain explained that some believed you
started over and some believed you went to a place of bliss or torment. Some believed
you just ceased to be. The entity asked the captain what he believed. From the
best I can remember the captain said he
felt that whatever came next it was greater and more awesome than the true
believers or the true non believers in an afterlife could ever know.
So, what do I believe? I believe very little these days. I
rely more on my life experience at 61 than I ever have in my life so far. My
experience tells me that God/Spirit is infinite. That love wins in the end and
that my life indeed is important and it matters. Jesus said God is love and he
also said love never fails. To lose a spirit to eternal torment or to oblivion
in my opinion would be the ultimate failure of God or Love. So, I don’t know
what happens. I think reincarnation is as real as physical evolution. But, I
don’t know and I don’t “believe.” I just am. But, I’m also just really hopeful
with what I think is good reason.
To die, to sleep- To sleep, perchance to Dream.
Peace!
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