Wednesday, September 29, 2021

Spooky Season

 No live organism can continue for long to exist safely under conditions of absolute reality....The Haunting of Hill House. "Shirley Jackson"


I love Halloween and haunted houses. My favorite movie is based on the Shirley Jackson novel "The Haunting of Hill House." 1963 version. There is a 1990's remake I believe but you can safely skip that one. Back when I was a little kid I was watching this black and white movie on TV. 

Even larks and Katydids are supposed by some to dream. ..Shirley Jackson

Lost in my own childish daydreams I didn't realize my mother had walked out of the room. All of a sudden I notice some spooky music coming from the TV.

Hill House, not sane, stood by itself against it's hills, holding darkness within...Shirley Jackson

In Spooky  black and white I see an adult lady talking to statues and pretending to dance in some garden or court of an old house. But, OMG! That statue moved and she's thinking and her thoughts are loud and scared and 😱

It had stood so for eighty years and might stand for eighty more...Shirley Jackson

I looked around. Where did mother go? I think the smart thing to do now is run out of the den. But, I'd have to run right past the TV. Better to wait for the next commercial.

Within, walls continued upright, bricks met neatly, and whatever walked there. Walked alone...The Haunting of Hill House "Shirley Jackson."

But, that commercial break couldn't break the spell. I stayed and cringed and was scared of every sound and every creak. I saw staircases where a governess hung herself. An old lady who first came to the house as a newborn but grew old and died banging her cane on the walls.

Two young women participating in a psychic experiment over a weekend at the house. Hearing banging on the wall. The one from the statue moving in the garden thinking in her head "why are you squeezing my hand also hard?"  Finally yelling out loud for her roommate to "Let Go Of My Hand" then it's gone and she hears the roommates voice clear across the room in the dark. "I've not been holding your hand!" 😰😱

Then you hear the lady talking in her own head again "Oh God. God. What was holding my hand? 😰😧

My little boy self was terrified. I never forgot that movie. Many years later I bought it on DVD. Restored and remastered and it still works! Glorious and scary. Black and white and paranoid. 

Horror movie buffs have often wondered and debated if the ghosts were real or psychological. Shirley Jackson passed at the young age of 48. But, a writer on the movie said he had always thought they were psychological. 

So he asked Shirley Jackson back then if the ghosts were supposed to be real. She said "they are real."

My 8 year old self could have told him that. 👻

Happy Halloween Season! 🎃👻

Sunday, September 26, 2021

Life, death and other boxes.

 I learned the truth at seventeen. That love was meant for beauty queens...Janis Ian


i know you were not born into perfection and I'm sorry that you had to go through what you did. It's hard and life isn't always fair. Being born with any condition less than perfection isn't always fair. It changed the trajectory of your life. It changed a lot of things but you still lived a life. And anything you came here with. You didn't lose. Your being. Your self. Your "I Am." No power. No entity in heaven or earth or the cosmos could take that from you. Nothing could suck your soul out of your being or steal it out of your pocket.

As a matter of fact there is no ruler of darkness trying or able to take your being. There may be forces psychological or spiritual causing you great fear. But, this is the dream. Not your being and not your consciousness. This life is the dream. Persistent, horrible, hopeful and tragically wonderful.

You're a part of everything and nothing that exists could work without you. So whatever the reason is for you being here. Whatever way and circumstance your birth or entry point was. You have purpose. You have reason. 


The above is a part of how I imagined a conversation with God might have gone if I could have listened in my troubled youth.



I think a lot about what the world is. What it's about. I was talking To my oldest friend. I mentioned something about my worldview. But, I kept it light hearted. Because when you're born and raised in Alabama. Not only Alabama but certainly in the South there is a certain mind set and tradition that you're born into.  Being from Alabama you have that Southern Baptist theology. Whether you're Baptist, Methodist, Church of God, Pentecostal or any other flavor of Bible belt theology. 


I imagine it's like being Catholic if you're from the Northeast. You may not be a Catholic but you have been around Catholic schools, theology and it's part of the fabric. Or maybe you're Jewish. Or if you're from Afghanistan or Iraq then you're more than likely Muslim. You might be devout or you might not be. But, by birth and cultural tradition you identify.


If you're born to a materialistic or secular humanist family  then perhaps any religion or spiritual belief is b.s. to you. Maybe you have made an uneasy alliance with total obliteration and still manage to convince yourself that your existence means something. And maybe it does. Whatever you can dance to and find your rhythm I can respect you on a personal level.


Even though I sincerely can't find hope in the sterile worldview of Bill Nye the Science Guy. I can understand not buying the angry big daddy in the sky that creates humans and then gets pissed at them for being human. And loves them as long as they say the magic words otherwise he will quite literally allow them to be tormented and tortured in fire forever. 


Or Jesus as the long suffering servant who the father loved so much that he had him tortured and murdered Just for you. He's coming back and he's pissed.


So much of our worldview comes as cultural and authoritarian interaction from our youth and society. 


So my oldest friend. While he can accept bodies knitting back together and coming out of tombs and Virgin births. Or at least give lip service to it. It's just our theological cultural tradition. Matter of fact he likely "believes" that on some level. 


I have another friend in Colorado that didn't believe in any spiritual reality. We were talking one day and he said that the universe was expanding. I asked what was it expanding into and if it was expanding into something then something must already exist. I pointed out that if I moved through space or expanded through space there had to at least be space. He got really angry and changed the subject. But, he really respected Cindy's intellect and one night I had a dream. The next day I told her of the outcome of a coming event. It didn't concern us. It was a pro football game. But, I had dreams in the past that were pre cognitive and this felt like that. It happened and later she related this to my friend. It didn't fit his worldview but he did say he would put it away and think about it later. The point being that atheists don't like to think any harder than religious people do about things that challenge their view of reality.


So when I come along and say I think consciousness is eternal and everything comes from consciousness awareness my old friends might say "what are you. A space cadet?" I mean a meaningless purpose less universe from nothing but dead matter? Sure. That's science(it isn't. But, that's another argument.) Angry God and eternal fire and talking snakes? Sure. That's God's love.  (It isn't) 

But the only thing we know for sure is we are conscious. Whatever that is. 


I've learned to hide my interest in ufo's. Little green men. Hardy, har, har. But, the religious silliness and atheistic depression? Sure. Pick a lane. But, if you think the universe is full of consciousness and life then you better keep it to yourself. 


You're born into a box and you have to choose which box. You have to put God in a box. The universe in a box. Science in a box. Don't you dare get out of the box or decide that boxes aren't always needed.


I also met (on facebook) a millennial author who is also from Alabama. He also decided the religious dogma was b.s. but he decided he was a devout atheist. He enjoys attacking faith. He's smart but as Jerry Clower  (Google this great Southern comedian) if you don't know who he is. But, as Jerry said "This guy is educated way above his intelligence." The millennial author made the silly statement that there was absolutely no evidence to suggest that consciousness was real apart from the human brain. Now you can be religious or atheist. I really don't care. But, when you stupidly deny hope for me then I get irritated. There are decades of research into ESP, Remote viewing, verification evidence of non local knowing apart from the brain. Children remembering past life's. Google The University of Virginia Department of Perceptual Studies and Doctor Jim Tucker. You might not come away convinced. I'm not convinced myself. I keep a healthy skeptical open mind. But to say absolutely no evidence is just lying at worst and ignorance at best.


As a matter of fact Jessica Utts who is a well regarded statistics professor stated that by any other scientific standard ESP would have already been proven. But materialism can't admit it. 


I know it sounds like as a person raised Christian that I'm bashing the faith. I don't mean to. I call myself a Jesus Follower. Because I relate to the one who said feed the hungry and clothe the poor. He didn't say drug test them first. He Said or at least the parable of the Good Samaritan says bind up the wounded and treat the stranger as brother or sister.


When you take away the dogma of Rome such as virgin births and realize the local preacher spouting fire and brimstone doesn't know much if anything about biblical history. The culture, society or original Greek, Aramaic or Hebrew the scriptures were written in. That they don't understand that the church of Rome decided what was god breathed in theology. Then you realize that their religious fanaticism doesn't really make sense.


For me. The incarnation no longer means an angry old man in the sky full of blood lust who created a child and called its birth a sin. Who would consign creatures to eternal fire or oblivion. Who would leave any creature in torment for eternity and call it love. 


Some evangelical folks don't realise that falling on your face and constantly telling a meglo  maniac on a throne how wonderful he is while calling yourself an unworthy worm isn't much of a heaven. So trying to frighten people by telling them they won't be able to spend eternity with people like that isn't as much of a threat as they think it is.


The incarnation to me is the eternal consciousness or love from which everything springs. loving me and all creatures and creation enough to come here and be a part of our journey. A hero might run into a house to pull you out but, only if he can. otherwise he leaves. But, love runs into the burning house. And seeing that he/she can't pull their loved one out. Then love sits down beside the victim and decides that it won't leave even at the cost of physical precious life.  That's Jesus to me. That's why I'm not a Christian. I'm A Jesus Follower. And on the final breath I might find that my perception of God or universe or Goddess isn't exactly correct. As a matter of fact I know it's not. But, Love never fails. I'm not being arrogant when I say. I'm not wrong about that.


Peace!