I had a kind of strange experience the other morning. Now before I start I do want to say this. I understand the concept of the faith "Christianity" which I was raised in. I have said several times that while I have not abandoned the faith of my youth I have certainly had my dogma run over. So, the following account will seem foolish to those who believe that we are nothing but the chemical processes of a organ in our skull. It will seem heretical and even deceitful to those who believe that the bible is the inerrant word of God from on high with no need to know the original language or circumstance or methods in which it has come to us over the centuries. It will seem like wisdom to those who are pie in the sky new age folks that just pull whatever meaning to life they need out of their butts. :-) But, what it is, is: ;-) an honest attempt by a human being on this earth to find the quiet place within and attempt to get in touch with the true nature of my own being. So, if I haven't completely bored you yet, here is what happened.
I wake up at around 4:30 AM. I don't always wake up unless it's to stumble to the bathroom and try not to completely wake up while actually hitting the target and then going back to bed. :-) Women, (my wife) seem to make a big deal about toilet lids and guys being careful. But, I digress :-)
Anyway, I can't sleep so I get my second favorite gift of this Christmas season ( a recliner being the first.) My new Kindle Fire HDX or whatever it's called. I put in my ear buds and pull up Doctor Brian Weiss on youtube. Now, Dr. Weiss is a very highly trained Psychiatrist who discovered past life regression some years ago. You can find his story by googling his name if you are interested. I am not searching for guru's at my age and I don't claim or mess with people who do claim to have all the answers. But, anyway having an interest in relaxing my mind as well as an interest in the concept of past lives I thought I would at least give the 30 minutes it would take to close my eyes and see where the video would take me.
I got quiet and said a little prayer and prepared the volume. I will give one spoiler here. I did not (and didn't really expect to) discover a past life. I did however go back to my childhood which is of course past life of a sort. This is where it gets a little intense for me.
I listened to the meditation. I felt the tension in my neck and shoulders and relaxed and released it from the soles of my feet to my neck, shoulders and concentrated on my breathing. So far so good. Might not discover I was Joan of Arc's lover from back in the day but I was relaxed. The doctor then said to float above a scene from my childhood. I then thought about a Christmas in Gadsden, Alabama on Chester Street in Walnut Park. I was very young. My grandparents had come by to visit. I don't know why but this was the memory (and I have always had this memory so it wasn't something I had pushed down or lost the memory of.) But, I could see the little boy that morning. It was as if I were looking at him (which was me) from a different perspective.
I was detached but felt intense empathy for him. He was so small and so innocent and I started to weep. I was crying for him (me) as if I were watching a different little being than myself. I guess I may have been crying for the years and the bumps and bruises and betrayals of the innocence that he (I?) had at that moment. I honestly don't know. Anyway, it really touched me and caused me to ponder and kind of go inside myself this week. I think it was Monday morning when this occurred.
The other thing I got was this. I have often thought about my life and some of the patterns of my life. Did I do something in a past life that I have paid for in this one? One of the things I came away with was this. I don't know if there is anything to the concept of past life's. But nothing I am going through today good or bad is the result of something I did in another existence that I have forgotten and am paying for now. My life and the responsibility of my life is what I do with it now.
Anyway, it was a very intense and personal experience and I just wanted to write it down. I have done that. Thanks for the time and in the words of Bernie Leadon of the Eagles from back in the day. "I wish you peace when the cold winds blow. Warm by the fire's glow.
Saturday, December 28, 2013
Thursday, November 14, 2013
The Journey
"Oh bless thee continuous stutter
Of the word being made into flesh..."
- Leonard Cohen
I think a lot these days about the flesh and the spirit. I look at life gone by like it all happened yesterday. I remember when I was young. I thought when I got old, there would be this long, long corridor of memory. I would sit in my chair and think wow, how long ago and far away it all is. But, it doesn't work that way at all. Not at all. Instead, my childhood and my teenage years and my young adult hood and the present "crows feet" around my eyes all happened just yesterday.
When you are old and grey and full of sleep,
And nodding by the fire, take down this book,
And slowly read, and dream of the soft look
Your eyes had once, and of their shadows deep;...William Butler Yeats.
Do not go gentle into that good night,
Old age should burn and rave at close of day;
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.. Dylan Thomas
I also am not so sure that the light will die.As a matter of fact I don't think it does. Old age should burn and rave at close of day;
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.. Dylan Thomas
Our birth is but a sleep and a forgetting;
The Soul that rises with us, our life's Star,
Hath had elsewhere its setting
And cometh from afar;
Not in entire forgetfulness,
And not in utter nakedness,
But trailing clouds of glory do we come
From God, who is our home: -William Wordsworth
I
knew a girl back in the day. She was not my "true love." But, she was a
friend and a soul mate along the journey. She was the true love of a
friend of mine though. I had a hard time thinking of her passing. But,
we get older and the "Emperor of all Maladies" You know the C word tends
to take the body out before it seems the spirit is ready to go. There
are other things and circumstances and we don't all get that rocker on
the front porch to look back at life from "old age" whatever that is.
I saw her not long after she left this mortal coil. Now
don't call the men in white coats just yet. I don't mean I saw her at
WalMart.
But, I had a dream and she was smiling.
There was a glint of mischievousness in her eyes. She looked young and
was moving around with the energy of youth. Just a dream? I don't know
but I'll take it and raise a hope that it was more than "just" anything.
I was raised to believe in God and although I call myself
a Christian Agnostic on my good days. I still believe we are more than
brain farts.
For all the years that I've traveled
some signs still take me home. There's a cross that one of the church
groups put up along my route to work. It's a simple looking cross and
there is a purple swatch of fabric draped across it. I've had a long
year and a really long "October." But, I look for that cross
while I go to work. I see that simple sign of my faith. The faith that I
don't quite fit into these days. I see that purple cloth and I hear in
my head "It is finished." I think about that when I'm down or troubled.
Somehow, I know that even any present trouble or anxiety is already
finished. The outcome isn't in doubt. Not really.
"And then I saw Him in the crowd
A lot of people had gathered round Him
The beggars shouted the lepers called Him".... Queen
"And then I saw Him in the crowd
A lot of people had gathered round Him
The beggars shouted the lepers called Him".... Queen
I
developed an interest in reincarnation during my journey through life.
It started for real sometime in the eighties if memory serves. It didn't
develop into a dogma or a religion "Thank God" but it does have a
certain resonance with my life experience and my journey. Who knows? I
don't, but I suspect.
A dream as the thunder wakes her
And her highwayman disappears
On a life already lived before
In eyes welled with tears ...Stevie Nicks
A dream as the thunder wakes her
And her highwayman disappears
On a life already lived before
In eyes welled with tears ...Stevie Nicks
So, here I am. Not old enough to be
elderly and to old to be young. I'm ready for the next part of the
eternal moment. After all..
." I gotta keep breathing. Because tomorrow the sun will rise. Who knows what the tide could bring? "..Tom Hanks in Cast A Way.
." I gotta keep breathing. Because tomorrow the sun will rise. Who knows what the tide could bring? "..Tom Hanks in Cast A Way.
I really do think life is an adventure. I also think
there are signs along the way that touch us and remind us of something
we've forgotten. Some part of our nature.
A gathering of angels appeared above my head,
They sang to me this song of hope and this is what they said,
They said come sail away, come sail away, come sail away with me lads,..Styx
A gathering of angels appeared above my head,
They sang to me this song of hope and this is what they said,
They said come sail away, come sail away, come sail away with me lads,..Styx
One day it will all come together.
Oh Wow!....Reportedly Steve Jobs last words "on earth"
I will make a pillar in the house of my God, and he will go out no more...Revelation 3:12
I will make a pillar in the house of my God, and he will go out no more...Revelation 3:12
It's good to have hope. It's what gets me up in the morning and lets me sleep in the night time.
So often times it happens that we live our lives in chains
And we never even know we have the key... Eagles
Peace!
So often times it happens that we live our lives in chains
And we never even know we have the key... Eagles
Thursday, November 7, 2013
The occasional life of Steve Snead
Wake up! Hard to do since I've been asleep as long as I can remember. Hard to rouse myself up so why don't you just tell me what's real and what isn't. Early memory: Looking up from a crib and seeing a smiling face with a hat on. Later will find that to be granddaddy. Big building with revolving doors and people in big coats. Later it would be called Cleveland, Ohio. Went there to visit my biological dad as a toddler.
First grade: Walnut Park Elementary in Gadsden, Alabama. Shiny and new desk and a big ole chart with the ABC Song led by my teacher. The desk reminds me of syrup and pancakes for some reason. It's the color and my imagination I'm sure. A is for the Apple that hangs upon the tree.
Phone call from school: Your son Steve just walks around during nap time. No, he isn't mean, but he keeps getting up. Naptime. Put our towels and blankets on the floor. My friend Larry is laughing in the bathroom. "What's going on?" Well, he says I heard a word last night that my parents repeated. They got real mad when I said it. Really? What was it? Well it starts with an "f" and well I'll tell you. ....Really? what does it mean? "I don't know but they got really mad at me." Later in the occasional life. A big church bus comes through Walnut Park. Kids pack on. I'm getting Baptized at Cherry Street Baptist. Wow, I had a stuffy nose a minute ago. But, now I'm standing here wet and yet my head is clear. I'll remember this for a life time. That is on occasion. Later, there will be enough fire and brimstone and hypocritical adults that I can go back to sleep.
Sixth grade: Kids from all my childhood and the last year at my neighborhood school. My teacher is black and the first black teacher in this world where the only black people I've seen so far have been marching on t.v. Still, she has this way about her that just seems to exude a presence of acceptance and concern and even love. Not what I had been told that black folks were like.
General Forrest Junior High: It's so big. Who are all these people? Why are those black kids and white kids over there shoving each other? Where are my friends from the park? I just don't know about this. I think I'll keep my head down. That kid over there? He seems to really hate me. I don't know him but he seems to really want me to know that I have a scar on my face and he doesn't. I think I'll just keep down for a little while.
Emma Sansom High: We are going up to Sansom today to register for next year. I'll register for 10 grade. But, my mother has just said she is divorcing my stepdad. I'll be going to live with my grandparents in Altoona, Al. But, I was born and raised in Alabama City. How can I not go to Sansom? Well, at least I'll escape that stupid bully since he won't know where I went anyway. But, I'll miss the kids I grew up and went to school with for 9 years. Most of them have been a little distant since Walnut Park though. Oh well.
West End High: It's so small! The whole class together isn't as big as one home room at Emma Sansom or Forrest. Still, the kids are a little more laid back. They seem friendly enough. I think I hate school anyway so I'll just put my head down and wait for it to end.
This is adult hood? I'm gonna have another beer and another joint and I'll do something else tomorrow. I'm only a kid so it's not that big a deal. That's what one of the adults just said anyway. Later: Why don't you get a job, you bum. "Wait, didn't you just tell me I was just a kid yesterday?" What? Where did the years go?
Look in the mirror and wake up for just another minute since I'm in my late 20's. I think I'll finish my education or get a job or do something. Getting high and strung out was fun a few years ago but not so much now. I don't like the way people look at me and I don't want to be the town drunk or druggie.
Education. I get to teach at a private school while taking classes at Jacksonville state and I have a 2 year diploma from Gadsden State. I even started church again. Waking up a little but I'm not really sure of the fire and brimstone stuff. I think I'll just go to work at the county tax appraisers office.
Married? Well, I had thought about it but I didn't really expect it. Still, seems like it might work out. Still, it seems that other people have baggage too. Who knew? It's hard but we are going to Hawaii. I know I might be crazy but I'm not sure of just what works and what doesn't. On to Colorado. A son? I look at the sonogram and I bless him in the womb. I'm awake for a minute.
Why is she having such a hard time and seeming to be in so much pain. I see his little head and it doesn't look that big. WHAT? That's the head? OK, I'll never call women the weaker sex again. That would have killed me.
But, he is beautiful. I can't wait to hear his first words or see his first steps.
Work, it's what I do. No, I'm tired and besides I'm off and I just want to chill. I'm not thrilled but at the same time I'm just gonna keep my head down.
Change? Not yet, not again! This is hard and my finances aren't perfect. What if, what if what if?
End? Not really but kind of an
Epilogue:
Dream from several years ago. Wow, how vivid. There's my body back there. What a vivid red landscape. Who's this beside me? Seems like he could tell me anything I wanted to know. Well, I want to know about life and death and God and meaning and who am I and where did I come from and where am I going. So, I turn and ask. But as always in dreams I don't ask word for word as in waking life. I ask "What is the dream?"
He says "you ask too much."
A single tear runs down my face and I wake up.
A single tear really is running down my cheek.
So, still I ask What is the dream? Maybe one day!
First grade: Walnut Park Elementary in Gadsden, Alabama. Shiny and new desk and a big ole chart with the ABC Song led by my teacher. The desk reminds me of syrup and pancakes for some reason. It's the color and my imagination I'm sure. A is for the Apple that hangs upon the tree.
Phone call from school: Your son Steve just walks around during nap time. No, he isn't mean, but he keeps getting up. Naptime. Put our towels and blankets on the floor. My friend Larry is laughing in the bathroom. "What's going on?" Well, he says I heard a word last night that my parents repeated. They got real mad when I said it. Really? What was it? Well it starts with an "f" and well I'll tell you. ....Really? what does it mean? "I don't know but they got really mad at me." Later in the occasional life. A big church bus comes through Walnut Park. Kids pack on. I'm getting Baptized at Cherry Street Baptist. Wow, I had a stuffy nose a minute ago. But, now I'm standing here wet and yet my head is clear. I'll remember this for a life time. That is on occasion. Later, there will be enough fire and brimstone and hypocritical adults that I can go back to sleep.
Sixth grade: Kids from all my childhood and the last year at my neighborhood school. My teacher is black and the first black teacher in this world where the only black people I've seen so far have been marching on t.v. Still, she has this way about her that just seems to exude a presence of acceptance and concern and even love. Not what I had been told that black folks were like.
General Forrest Junior High: It's so big. Who are all these people? Why are those black kids and white kids over there shoving each other? Where are my friends from the park? I just don't know about this. I think I'll keep my head down. That kid over there? He seems to really hate me. I don't know him but he seems to really want me to know that I have a scar on my face and he doesn't. I think I'll just keep down for a little while.
Emma Sansom High: We are going up to Sansom today to register for next year. I'll register for 10 grade. But, my mother has just said she is divorcing my stepdad. I'll be going to live with my grandparents in Altoona, Al. But, I was born and raised in Alabama City. How can I not go to Sansom? Well, at least I'll escape that stupid bully since he won't know where I went anyway. But, I'll miss the kids I grew up and went to school with for 9 years. Most of them have been a little distant since Walnut Park though. Oh well.
West End High: It's so small! The whole class together isn't as big as one home room at Emma Sansom or Forrest. Still, the kids are a little more laid back. They seem friendly enough. I think I hate school anyway so I'll just put my head down and wait for it to end.
This is adult hood? I'm gonna have another beer and another joint and I'll do something else tomorrow. I'm only a kid so it's not that big a deal. That's what one of the adults just said anyway. Later: Why don't you get a job, you bum. "Wait, didn't you just tell me I was just a kid yesterday?" What? Where did the years go?
Look in the mirror and wake up for just another minute since I'm in my late 20's. I think I'll finish my education or get a job or do something. Getting high and strung out was fun a few years ago but not so much now. I don't like the way people look at me and I don't want to be the town drunk or druggie.
Education. I get to teach at a private school while taking classes at Jacksonville state and I have a 2 year diploma from Gadsden State. I even started church again. Waking up a little but I'm not really sure of the fire and brimstone stuff. I think I'll just go to work at the county tax appraisers office.
Married? Well, I had thought about it but I didn't really expect it. Still, seems like it might work out. Still, it seems that other people have baggage too. Who knew? It's hard but we are going to Hawaii. I know I might be crazy but I'm not sure of just what works and what doesn't. On to Colorado. A son? I look at the sonogram and I bless him in the womb. I'm awake for a minute.
Why is she having such a hard time and seeming to be in so much pain. I see his little head and it doesn't look that big. WHAT? That's the head? OK, I'll never call women the weaker sex again. That would have killed me.
But, he is beautiful. I can't wait to hear his first words or see his first steps.
Work, it's what I do. No, I'm tired and besides I'm off and I just want to chill. I'm not thrilled but at the same time I'm just gonna keep my head down.
Change? Not yet, not again! This is hard and my finances aren't perfect. What if, what if what if?
End? Not really but kind of an
Epilogue:
Dream from several years ago. Wow, how vivid. There's my body back there. What a vivid red landscape. Who's this beside me? Seems like he could tell me anything I wanted to know. Well, I want to know about life and death and God and meaning and who am I and where did I come from and where am I going. So, I turn and ask. But as always in dreams I don't ask word for word as in waking life. I ask "What is the dream?"
He says "you ask too much."
A single tear runs down my face and I wake up.
A single tear really is running down my cheek.
So, still I ask What is the dream? Maybe one day!
Saturday, October 19, 2013
Religion, Evolution and me.
Here I am getting ready to attend my first Alabama game in Bryant Denny Stadium. My wife can't go and my friend says it's just not gonna work with his schedule this time. My nephew can't go because it's such short notice. So, I'm going solo. Should be an exciting interesting and hopefully a fun day. Anyway, I wake up this morning around 4:00 AM. Excited about the game? Not really. I mean I look forward to it but I'm not 13 years old anymore. Life has gotten a little more complicated and my thoughts are more on the economy and my job and health and the hope that my son has a good life. So, of course I started to think about my journey and decided to write another blog since I'm up! :-)
I was reading some on the interwebs (Thank you Al Gore and Bill Gates and all the ships at sea) Anyway, I digress (when do I not?) When I came across an article about one of my favorite NPR programs. "On Being" with Krista Tippett. She interviews people from the Dali Lama to the leading scientist and other religious and new age and cutting edge researchers of the day. I have been known to take a break from Art Bell or Coast to Coast podcast and download one of her interviews for my daily walk. Anyway, she was talking to some young people of today who have left the faith of their parents and their youth. Former Christians who have become atheist. To be honest (here's the cranky old guy part) I didn't read the article because (A) I had a LOT of living and experience to go through when I was 18-25 years old and didn't really think I needed to read the "wisdom" of those kids. (B) See A. :=0
Yeah, I know that I don't know but since I was playing the cranky "older" card I went on my way. Or so I thought.
Now, I started to think about my own journey this morning as I am trying to get back to sleep. I think about that article and then my mind goes into that thing where it's like a snake that is eating it's own tail and before you know it the morning is in gear and I might as well get the heck up anyway!
So, I decided to write this blog. It goes something like this. But, first the following is Not meant to deride, cast stones or claim any kind of authority to tell you ultimate truth. The following is a short allegory of some of my experience going through life. Names have been changed and people places and things have been combined to protect the innocent. :-)
So, here you are ( I am) and you're just a kid. So, this grownup says "Ya know God is a father in the sky and he loves you." But, he also is angry and will punish you if you don't do what the (church,synagogue, Mosque, temple) says. So, there ya go and you are doing fine and then you meet up with a person with authority and knowledge that you don't have. So, this guy, girl, woman, man has something else to tell you.
Well, ya know the concept of a big daddy in the sky is a very superstitious way of looking at the world. See these bones and the way evolution works? You don't need or have a god. Evolution explains (it doesn't) the reason for life. Also, see this picture of a chocolate cake? Well, your brain just lit up and that's why you want the chocolate cake. See? that's all it comes down to and we will "One day prove by science" that you are nothing but a chemical by product of the glorious evolution that will one day end in oblivion of mankind.
Huhh? I know you are smart but that doesn't even make me feel better than the mad ole man in the sky from my youth! ;-(
So, here I am thinking (again) that somewhere somebody is missing something. So, where does that leave me? Well, I have to go to my lifelong inner dialog. I have had dreams that actually told me something that would and did happen in my "waking" life. I've had synchronicity where I've thought of a phrase or a person and turned on a radio or gotten a call or put a cd in the player and there is the song or the words or the thought that I was just having. I remember an angel from years ago at my bedside. I didn't bother to look over because I "knew" and went to sleep and was/am protected. I have had my own encounter with spiritual experience that I can't really explain. So, no I'm not an atheist.
But, I do understand where those young men and women are coming from. They are caught up in the information age. It's great in many ways. But, it's also a culture of soundbites. "Got'cha" moments and information overload without any real digging or thinking past the blurb or the "Press this part and the brain lights up" stuff. But, still I understand. No longer can Brother Bob of the "Temple of the redeemer and Holy Ghost with Signs Following" tell people what's real and what isn't. That's a good thing.
But, I worry about other authority figures. What if Brother Dawkins tells them they are no more than a brain fart and are superstitious idiots if they dig any deeper? What if Brother or Sister Clinton tell them that to question the democrats or liberal will make them a hay seed redneck racist southern backwoods idiot? What if Brother Limbaugh tells them that all liberals are godless communist baby killing scum that shouldn't even be allowed to teach or talk? What then?
Well,, right now that looks a lot like 21 century America and the world at large. So, yeah it concerns me. Anyway that's my thought for the morning. Sun's coming up and I've got a big game to get ready for.
Peace!
I was reading some on the interwebs (Thank you Al Gore and Bill Gates and all the ships at sea) Anyway, I digress (when do I not?) When I came across an article about one of my favorite NPR programs. "On Being" with Krista Tippett. She interviews people from the Dali Lama to the leading scientist and other religious and new age and cutting edge researchers of the day. I have been known to take a break from Art Bell or Coast to Coast podcast and download one of her interviews for my daily walk. Anyway, she was talking to some young people of today who have left the faith of their parents and their youth. Former Christians who have become atheist. To be honest (here's the cranky old guy part) I didn't read the article because (A) I had a LOT of living and experience to go through when I was 18-25 years old and didn't really think I needed to read the "wisdom" of those kids. (B) See A. :=0
Yeah, I know that I don't know but since I was playing the cranky "older" card I went on my way. Or so I thought.
Now, I started to think about my own journey this morning as I am trying to get back to sleep. I think about that article and then my mind goes into that thing where it's like a snake that is eating it's own tail and before you know it the morning is in gear and I might as well get the heck up anyway!
So, I decided to write this blog. It goes something like this. But, first the following is Not meant to deride, cast stones or claim any kind of authority to tell you ultimate truth. The following is a short allegory of some of my experience going through life. Names have been changed and people places and things have been combined to protect the innocent. :-)
So, here you are ( I am) and you're just a kid. So, this grownup says "Ya know God is a father in the sky and he loves you." But, he also is angry and will punish you if you don't do what the (church,synagogue, Mosque, temple) says. So, there ya go and you are doing fine and then you meet up with a person with authority and knowledge that you don't have. So, this guy, girl, woman, man has something else to tell you.
Well, ya know the concept of a big daddy in the sky is a very superstitious way of looking at the world. See these bones and the way evolution works? You don't need or have a god. Evolution explains (it doesn't) the reason for life. Also, see this picture of a chocolate cake? Well, your brain just lit up and that's why you want the chocolate cake. See? that's all it comes down to and we will "One day prove by science" that you are nothing but a chemical by product of the glorious evolution that will one day end in oblivion of mankind.
Huhh? I know you are smart but that doesn't even make me feel better than the mad ole man in the sky from my youth! ;-(
So, here I am thinking (again) that somewhere somebody is missing something. So, where does that leave me? Well, I have to go to my lifelong inner dialog. I have had dreams that actually told me something that would and did happen in my "waking" life. I've had synchronicity where I've thought of a phrase or a person and turned on a radio or gotten a call or put a cd in the player and there is the song or the words or the thought that I was just having. I remember an angel from years ago at my bedside. I didn't bother to look over because I "knew" and went to sleep and was/am protected. I have had my own encounter with spiritual experience that I can't really explain. So, no I'm not an atheist.
But, I do understand where those young men and women are coming from. They are caught up in the information age. It's great in many ways. But, it's also a culture of soundbites. "Got'cha" moments and information overload without any real digging or thinking past the blurb or the "Press this part and the brain lights up" stuff. But, still I understand. No longer can Brother Bob of the "Temple of the redeemer and Holy Ghost with Signs Following" tell people what's real and what isn't. That's a good thing.
But, I worry about other authority figures. What if Brother Dawkins tells them they are no more than a brain fart and are superstitious idiots if they dig any deeper? What if Brother or Sister Clinton tell them that to question the democrats or liberal will make them a hay seed redneck racist southern backwoods idiot? What if Brother Limbaugh tells them that all liberals are godless communist baby killing scum that shouldn't even be allowed to teach or talk? What then?
Well,, right now that looks a lot like 21 century America and the world at large. So, yeah it concerns me. Anyway that's my thought for the morning. Sun's coming up and I've got a big game to get ready for.
Peace!
Monday, October 7, 2013
Tea Party vs Christians.
Last week I found a wonderful blog. It gives me hope that Christianity really will grow and expand instead of dying on the vine with the Pat Robertsons and right wing zealots of the world. I see where some young folks have not abandoned the faith of their youth but are transforming it from the dry and dead bigotry of their elders. Anyway, I posted a link because it made some points wonderfully. Points about giving and caring for the poor and all that "hippie Christian stuff" that the right is so sure is sinful and communistic and heretical. Anyway, I posted it because I really like it and like most humans on the planet I agreed with it so I called it good. ;-)
However, to be honest apart from the linking of other post I am worn slap out by the state of American politics right now. I see people who truly need health care who can't get it. I see people who are slaves to a coorporate mentality who can't follow their heart because if they lose their job they lose their health care. I see politicians getting a pension for life after retiring from "serving." Lawd, I wish I could "serve" somebody for 150,000 a year and get a pension and take tax funded trips to Europe. But, anyway with that I also see the nation giving billions of dollars out like candy to "Muslim Brotherhood" and to Israel's defense and to ram a government that they don't want down the throats of people in the middle east. I saw a president start two wars and there was nary a peep from the good tea party type folks that we were wasting billions and billions of dollars a week and destroying untold lives with bombs and bullets. Both ours and theirs. Then the other side once they "own" the bombs started talking about how we needed to start another intervention. For the good of humanity don'tcha know?
The difference is that this president (love him or hate him) did listen and he backed off the war drums at least for now. Anyway, the folks who didn't think it odd to spend billions on bombs and bullets and giving money to other countries think it's horrible to even think about giving a child or an old person or even a young person access to health care. You can always justify it but you better not think too deeply about it.
Anyway, I got a response from two types of friends. One I could understand. I disagreed but I still got it. One was raised in an upper middle class family with cousins by the dozens and a supportive family. No knowledge there of wondering if there was a can of tuna in the cupboard growing up to fix a sandwich with. That type person I can at least understand feeling like they do. They were born on third base and think they hit a triple. :-)
It was the other friend that I lost it with. I admit it. I gave a snarky ugly reply and acted like a jerk. Why? Because I was just so damn tired of the far right attitude toward people who disagree with them. So, tired of people claiming Christ and acting like Ayn Rand. Also, this particular friend is not able to work and has several health issues. If not for the "liberal" hippie types he wouldn't be able to get medication. He is also is trying to get disability and Medicaid insurance and basically be able to live a better life. I truly hope he makes it. But, at the same time there was this nasty "stupid liberal" theme running through his post that I just lost it with.
I finally ended with the comment that for somebody who needs Medicaid and health care and food, to vote conservative republican is like a black person joining the KKK. Should I have said it? No, I wish I hadn't. Do I believe it? Yes.
The one thing I do wish the Christian church would do? Well, if you are gonna say "we shouldn't use the government to feed and clothe people" then at least be consistent. You also need to say "we shouldn't use the government to tell people who they can marry" or to tell a woman what she has to do with her body. Not that I like abortion, just that it is not my call. At least not outside the religious community. But, I digress.
Anyway, agree or disagree I am honored that you took the time to read this. I'm afraid my friend won't see this one because (and I really can't blame him) I wasn't very graceful the last time somebody "posted" on something I wrote. I'll try to do better.
However, to be honest apart from the linking of other post I am worn slap out by the state of American politics right now. I see people who truly need health care who can't get it. I see people who are slaves to a coorporate mentality who can't follow their heart because if they lose their job they lose their health care. I see politicians getting a pension for life after retiring from "serving." Lawd, I wish I could "serve" somebody for 150,000 a year and get a pension and take tax funded trips to Europe. But, anyway with that I also see the nation giving billions of dollars out like candy to "Muslim Brotherhood" and to Israel's defense and to ram a government that they don't want down the throats of people in the middle east. I saw a president start two wars and there was nary a peep from the good tea party type folks that we were wasting billions and billions of dollars a week and destroying untold lives with bombs and bullets. Both ours and theirs. Then the other side once they "own" the bombs started talking about how we needed to start another intervention. For the good of humanity don'tcha know?
The difference is that this president (love him or hate him) did listen and he backed off the war drums at least for now. Anyway, the folks who didn't think it odd to spend billions on bombs and bullets and giving money to other countries think it's horrible to even think about giving a child or an old person or even a young person access to health care. You can always justify it but you better not think too deeply about it.
Anyway, I got a response from two types of friends. One I could understand. I disagreed but I still got it. One was raised in an upper middle class family with cousins by the dozens and a supportive family. No knowledge there of wondering if there was a can of tuna in the cupboard growing up to fix a sandwich with. That type person I can at least understand feeling like they do. They were born on third base and think they hit a triple. :-)
It was the other friend that I lost it with. I admit it. I gave a snarky ugly reply and acted like a jerk. Why? Because I was just so damn tired of the far right attitude toward people who disagree with them. So, tired of people claiming Christ and acting like Ayn Rand. Also, this particular friend is not able to work and has several health issues. If not for the "liberal" hippie types he wouldn't be able to get medication. He is also is trying to get disability and Medicaid insurance and basically be able to live a better life. I truly hope he makes it. But, at the same time there was this nasty "stupid liberal" theme running through his post that I just lost it with.
I finally ended with the comment that for somebody who needs Medicaid and health care and food, to vote conservative republican is like a black person joining the KKK. Should I have said it? No, I wish I hadn't. Do I believe it? Yes.
The one thing I do wish the Christian church would do? Well, if you are gonna say "we shouldn't use the government to feed and clothe people" then at least be consistent. You also need to say "we shouldn't use the government to tell people who they can marry" or to tell a woman what she has to do with her body. Not that I like abortion, just that it is not my call. At least not outside the religious community. But, I digress.
Anyway, agree or disagree I am honored that you took the time to read this. I'm afraid my friend won't see this one because (and I really can't blame him) I wasn't very graceful the last time somebody "posted" on something I wrote. I'll try to do better.
Thursday, September 26, 2013
Tuesday, September 3, 2013
War no more!
I am against war as a matter of principle. I remember thinking as George Bush got us into two wars at one time how damn stupid it was. Just from a military standpoint alone it was stupid. But, from a human standpoint. I remember thinking "this isn't a video game." The bombs were real. We were going to win the hearts and minds of people who hated us by blowing their homes to hell and back. The other thing I remember? Most of the victims of the "freeing of Iraq/Afghanistan" were poor people and women and children and elderly people. They were the ones getting torn apart by the bombs. Oh, and our own young men and women. Mothers and daughters and fathers and sons were coming home with missing limbs and PTSD. I worked for the army on Fort Carson. I still remember the kids worrying if mom or dad were part of the news story about casualties. I still remember the chapel and the funerals starting up. I still remember civilian staff on the base catching their breath and running to the t.v. every time another report or bulletin would flash on the screen.
It just seemed wrong to me deep down in my spirit to think that bombing and maiming and carnage was going to "fix" something. I feel that feeling every time I hear of another "freedom fighter" or Muslim Brotherhood or Arab Spring or African conflict. I know that somewhere a daddy isn't coming home and a mommy isn't going to fix her daughters hair for school anymore. I know that somewhere a bomb is destroying a home and a person is losing an eye or an arm or a leg. War, what is it good for? Ask the politicians and the Enrons and the stock brokers.
Now, that I've said that I need to say this. Those of us against war for any reason are often asked "What about Hitler?" What about the holocaust? What would you have said back then? Would you have been saying "Don't go into Berlin?" Honestly? I don't know. That's the problem with absolutes and zealotry. There are always questions. Always, wondering "is it right?" Did I do the right thing? People getting poisoned by chemicals and I say we can't go in there. I have to look at that and ask myself am I sure. But, where did the ones who used the chemicals get them? How did they get them? Who will the bombs fall on? Just the ones who used chemical weapons? Or will they fall on husbands and wives and children and brothers and sisters? How deep in the bunker will the bad guys go before they are finally dealt with? Who are the bad guys by the way?
Rumsfield dined with Saddam and Kerry dined with Assad. Who foots those bills? The American military and their families mostly. The poor folks in Iraq and Syria and other places mostly. Always seems that way doesn't it? Maybe, we could try to get the U.N. involved for a change. Maybe we could just not be the first ones in and the last ones to leave for a change? Maybe? What if we continue to pressure Russia in the arena of the U.N.? What if we continue to push for economic sanctions on the money of the Syrian leaders. What if we don't blindly go in and shove a government of the U.S. choosing down the throats of the people?
I still remember the billions and billions of dollars that Bush wasted. Yet, the conservatives didn't worry much about the deficit. Hmmm. I still remember Obama getting a little peace prize. before he had done a damn thing. Might be good for him cause he sure wouldn't be in the running right now. I'm so sick of it. My nation is being torn apart by idiotic choosing of "our" team instead of holding people of both parties accountable. Funny, how if I say "Why don't we have health care for everybody, so that nobody has to be a slave to a corporate health plan" I hear "We can't pay for that!" Oh, but we can pay for the bombs and the life and limbs. That's no problem. That's the cost of freedom.
I also noticed something else when I worked for the army. The soldiers dying? They were not all 1950's blond haired blue eyed all American Christians. There were blacks and whites and Hispanics and Asians and women and men. Thing is they did have one thing in common. They were mostly from lower middle to lower class America. They needed a job and training and health insurance. Oh well. It is a complicated matter. I honestly don't have all the answers and I don't know if I'm right or wrong with a certainty. But, I really would like to give another way other than war a chance. Just once.
Peace.
It just seemed wrong to me deep down in my spirit to think that bombing and maiming and carnage was going to "fix" something. I feel that feeling every time I hear of another "freedom fighter" or Muslim Brotherhood or Arab Spring or African conflict. I know that somewhere a daddy isn't coming home and a mommy isn't going to fix her daughters hair for school anymore. I know that somewhere a bomb is destroying a home and a person is losing an eye or an arm or a leg. War, what is it good for? Ask the politicians and the Enrons and the stock brokers.
Now, that I've said that I need to say this. Those of us against war for any reason are often asked "What about Hitler?" What about the holocaust? What would you have said back then? Would you have been saying "Don't go into Berlin?" Honestly? I don't know. That's the problem with absolutes and zealotry. There are always questions. Always, wondering "is it right?" Did I do the right thing? People getting poisoned by chemicals and I say we can't go in there. I have to look at that and ask myself am I sure. But, where did the ones who used the chemicals get them? How did they get them? Who will the bombs fall on? Just the ones who used chemical weapons? Or will they fall on husbands and wives and children and brothers and sisters? How deep in the bunker will the bad guys go before they are finally dealt with? Who are the bad guys by the way?
Rumsfield dined with Saddam and Kerry dined with Assad. Who foots those bills? The American military and their families mostly. The poor folks in Iraq and Syria and other places mostly. Always seems that way doesn't it? Maybe, we could try to get the U.N. involved for a change. Maybe we could just not be the first ones in and the last ones to leave for a change? Maybe? What if we continue to pressure Russia in the arena of the U.N.? What if we continue to push for economic sanctions on the money of the Syrian leaders. What if we don't blindly go in and shove a government of the U.S. choosing down the throats of the people?
I still remember the billions and billions of dollars that Bush wasted. Yet, the conservatives didn't worry much about the deficit. Hmmm. I still remember Obama getting a little peace prize. before he had done a damn thing. Might be good for him cause he sure wouldn't be in the running right now. I'm so sick of it. My nation is being torn apart by idiotic choosing of "our" team instead of holding people of both parties accountable. Funny, how if I say "Why don't we have health care for everybody, so that nobody has to be a slave to a corporate health plan" I hear "We can't pay for that!" Oh, but we can pay for the bombs and the life and limbs. That's no problem. That's the cost of freedom.
I also noticed something else when I worked for the army. The soldiers dying? They were not all 1950's blond haired blue eyed all American Christians. There were blacks and whites and Hispanics and Asians and women and men. Thing is they did have one thing in common. They were mostly from lower middle to lower class America. They needed a job and training and health insurance. Oh well. It is a complicated matter. I honestly don't have all the answers and I don't know if I'm right or wrong with a certainty. But, I really would like to give another way other than war a chance. Just once.
Peace.
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