Scary Stories and Fun times.

{This is the evening news, let's go now to our field reporter
Renaldo Riviera, this is Renaldo Riviera on the banks
Of the stinky muddy river with Mr. R.V. Frisbee
Who claims to have witnessed something truly fantastic
Mr. Frisbee could you tell us what you saw}….”I saw Elvis in a U.F.O….Ray Stevens

 

I have fun with pop culture. UFO’s and the X-Files and Stephen King novels and Ancient Aliens and the Annunaki.  It’s kind of funny because some of my love for horror and the off beat comes from my country music loving Bible belt mother. I remember as a kid watching those old b-movie’s on Dialing for Dollars such as “The Colossal Man” and other sci fi  movies. When Christiopher Lee or Vincent Price horror movies were on at the drive in we were there. Dark Shadows? I rushed home to see the latest adventures of Barnabas and the Collins Family.

 

{Yeah, I's just hunkered down over there puttin' a stink wad
On my trot line and the short hairs just stood straight out
On the back of my neck and I turned around
And there's this big orange thing with them purple lights on it
Come swoopin' over them pine trees
And just hovered over the Winnebago there}

 

Old horror comics along with my super hero and Archie comics as a kid kept me entertained. I remember watching “The Haunting” in the original black and white as a kid. Scared the yell outta me. But, I loved it. I swear those statues in the garden moved.

 

{Inez run out, throwed a skillet at it and then she scissored
And run back in up on the hide-a-bed
'Bout that time a little trap door opened up
Little stair steps come down
And this little pink bald headed guy stuck his head out}

 

Yep, fun and getting scared combined. I needed a night light. But, at the same time I couldn’t wait for my next “scary fix.”

 

{Now I'd seen that movie 'Clost Encounters'
I just walked on over there big as Ike and looked up in there
And there he was, there who was?}

I saw Elvis in a U.F.O., sittin' there with Howard Hughes
I saw Elvis in a U.F.O., Jimmy Hoffa was in there too
I saw Elvis in a U.F.O., singin' them rhythm an' blues
An' Liberace was there an' he had on a pair of Imelda Marcos shoes

 

My family was also full of stories. Two that I remember well. One from my mother’s mother who was blued eyed and of Irish descent. One that reminded me of my Granddaddy who was Dutch-Cherokee decent.  My Grandmother told the story of an aunt who didn’t like her when she  was a little girl. So, as the story goes way back in the early part of the last century. The aunt died. My grandmother is playing in the big old house. She hears something on the stairs and looks up. There’s her aunt. The aunt says “Mozelle (which was my grandmothers name) I’ve been waiting a long time for this.” I was so young I don’t remember  the rest of the story. But, it was chillingly good. I was really scared and really anxious to hear it again.

Then the other story concerns the town of my birth. Gadsden, Alabama has a natural waterfall. It’s called Noccalula Falls. This is the way the adults in my family tell it:

A long time ago there were two tribes living in the area. One was a noble Cherokee tribe and the other was a more war like tribe. The Cherokee Chief had a beautiful daughter named Noccalula. She fell in love with a handsome brave of her own tribe. However, her father promised her to the son of the chief of the war like tribe to ensure peace for his tribe. Noccalula being in love was distraught. So, rather than marry a man she didn’t love. She cast herself off the rocks of the falls. But, late at night. When  the moon is shining and the night is still. You can hear her crying and if you look close you can see her sitting on a rock combing her long black hair as she weeps for her lost love.

See? Wonderful stories and a little bit of terror thrown in.

 

 “There is nothing in the dark that isn't there when the lights are on.”
― Rod Serling

 

I saw my own ufo not so very many years ago. I’m in my backyard in Northport, Alabama. I see a craft going slowly across the sky. It’s a clear warm southern night and I look for the red lights of a plane and listen for the engine. I don’t see any red lights or hear anything at all. But, it just stops. Dead still. I think well an ordinary plane doesn’t just stop. So, it must be a helicopter. Except it isn’t making a sound and there are no landing lights. No, chop, chop, chop sound of propellers and it’s dark and most copters aren’t flying around the outskirts of Tuscaloosa/Northport at this time of night. I yell for Cindy but she’s in  the middle of a t.v. show and says “If they land or abduct you let me know.” Sheesh, everyone’s a skeptic. Anyway, all of a sudden it makes a zig zag pattern in the sky and moves off. What was it? Aliens? I’m skeptical. But, I keep looking in case it/they come back.

 

Nothing was a-gonna drive me away
When I seen something that give me the creeps
Had one big eye and two big feet
I stood right there and I did the freeze
It did the stroll right up to me
Made a noise with its feet that sounded like a drum
Said "You gonna be here when the morning comes?"
"Say yes, I'll be here when the morning comes
I'll be right here, I ain't gonna run
I bought this house, now I am boss
Ain't no haint's gonna run me off….Haunted House..Roger Miller? Not sure of the original writer or performer but I remember the song.

 

Haint is my grandparents North Alabama Appalachian word for ghost.  It’s what my grandmother said when she saw the ghost or “haint” of her aunt.

Anyway, I love it all. From the old giant ants and spiders of 50’s sci fi to the vampires and werewolfs of old Universal and Hammer Films. Nothing like a good scare. Nothing like a good story. Especially if the grownups swear it’s true. All true. The 10 year old in me loves it. As Uncle Stevie (my favorite author) says:

There’s something I want to show you, something I want you to touch. It’s in a room not far from here….Night Shift.

Not long until Halloween. I  can’t wait.  Did I ever tell you about the time I watched “The Haunting” adapted from the book by Shirley Jackson?

 

Peace!