Christmas, stuff and being 60.

Just a little out of step. I look back on life and it seems like I have always been just a little out of step. Out of time, out of place. Just couldn’t quite be satisfied with easy answers  even if they came from preachers or peoples interpretation of ancient scriptures or even the great god SCIENCE that is just a series of methods and not an entity unto itself.

 

Born in the mud,
Raised in the wild
Washed in the blood,
God's Problem Child

I feel the shine, following me
Not far behind, that's where I wanna be
A little out of town, fine by me…God’s Problem Child, Willie Nelson.

 

I learned to accept that I wasn’t really in sync with my tribe and even to embrace it. Don’t give me no “think out of the box” if that just means you want me to trade my box for yours.

Christmas is kind of like that for me. I see the ads and hear the carols and even know the Reason for the Season. But, it’s all just a little off or maybe I am. I miss those that are no longer here and I miss a simpler time even if most of it is just in my own perception and really wasn’t all that simple at the time.

My 15 year old son is more than likely the most intelligent of our little family. Cindy might disagree but I’m telling you I wasn’t as confident in my own ability to think for myself at 25 as he is at 15. But, he’s not traditional. Some of that might be because I was older when he came in to this world. But, he’s not the sports fan that I am and he isn’t interested at all in religion or being told how to think or believe. I’m proud, awed and afraid for him at the same time.

This world doesn’t like those that don’t conform. That don’t blindly believe or accept someone else’s experience as their own gospel. Still, there are those who manage. Right Willie?

Darkness may fall
We still got a light
Keeping us all
Safe through the night

Heaven must love
God's problem child…Willie Nelson

I see lot’s of statements on facebook these days. People who are so confident of their religion, politics and they love to state things and talk about how brave they are for being a Christian, Liberal,Conservative,Atheist or whatever. But, ya know what? Being in a Christian church and saying Jesus is Lord isn’t brave. Being in a Richard Dawkins group and saying there isn’t any reason other than chance for the universe isn’t brave. Being in a group of conservatives and saying conservatives are right and libs are tards isn’t brave or decent. Being in a Liberal group and saying all conservatives are red neck inbreds isn’t brave or decent.

But, stepping out of the group think and demanding accountability is considered cowardly? Rush Limbaugh says it is. He hates moderates. But, then again Rush has been known to make fun of a lady who died a painful death from cancer. I know this because I remember it from back in the 90’s when I was also a Ditto Head. That was the name us Rush lovers called ourselves back then. Yep, little ole liberal me was once so far right that Roy Moore would have loaned me his horse and pop gun.

Ya know the best thing about turning 60? The absolute most astounding thing? I don’t have to worry about silly stuff like trying to strut around women as if I’m a teenager. I can tell a woman she’s pretty or a great friend and it doesn’t mean that I’m trying to make a move on her or cheat on my wife. I don’t have to try and pretend to be anything I’m not. Actually, I never did but it took getting older to realize it. I finally realize that most of the time the people I worried so much about and tried to impress were not actually thinking of me that much anyway. So, there was really no reason for me to sweat about their opinion. They had their own stuff to deal with.

So, yeah for me this year Christmas is going to be chill. I am going to eat a Christmas lunch with Cindy and Fox and then call my mom in Gadsden and check in by phone with my dad in Birmingham and just relax. I’m not going to “try and get in the Christmas spirit” because that’s just too much work and trouble. Goodness, people run themselves ragged trying to show how happy they are this time of year.

So, Merry Christmas and I hope for peace on earth and good will towards men and women but I ain’t going  to strain myself with worry or showing how Christmasy I am either. Peace.

 

Heaven must love
God's problem child
Heaven must love
God's problem child
Heaven must love
God's problem child