Friday, July 22, 2016

Jesus, Social Work and Me.

Sometimes I wish I had a job where it didn't matter what the $/& I said or did. I don't like being responsible for or in a position of responsibility for what and when other people eat. I don't want to decide when an old person should be in a nursing home. I don't want to know about the hungry kids or the abused woman or the stinking poverty that people live in. I don't want to know that a child is living in a house literally surrounded by shit because the @#$%#$ sewer overflowed and the landlord don't care and the minimum wage job the dad works can't feed a family of four. There they are Church. THEY HAD THE Babies. THEY DIDN'T ABORT THEM. PRAISE JESUS. What? you don't want to expand Medicaid because it's a hippy liberal handout? You think they should get off their lazy asses and get off the food stamps. Raising  the minimum wage will make it worse? REALLY! I've never said this because I do have conservative friends that I truly love. I've never said this because Jesus said Love is patient. Love is Kind. Love never fails. But, you know what I want to say to you right now? From this little 5"4 Hippy liberal social worker? FUCK YOU! Now go back to the smug little Rush Limbaugh and Pat Robertson wet dream of heaven. But, I needed to rant today. I hope I don't lose friends over this. But, on the other hand. I've seen babies living in shit. I've seen daddies who can't pay the rent. I've seen momma's who can't buy their child a birthday present. I'm Tired. So Tired.
I just want to drive a $#&@# crane or put round pegs in round holes and go home every night and curse out the ump or referees on my widescreen t.v.
Jesus Wept!

Sunday, July 10, 2016

Jesus, Hillary and Donald

"Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven."...Jesus

Losers....Donald Trump

"Blessed are they who mourn, for they shall be comforted."...Jesus

See? I was proven right by this killing...Donald Trump

"Blessed are the meek for they shall inherit the earth." Jesus

What difference does it make?....Hillary Clinton

"Blessed are they who hunger and thirst for righteousness for they shall be satisfied."..Jesus

Franklin Graham pulled in salary of: $622,000 Samaritan's Purse and $258,000 Billy Graham Evangelistic Association

"Blessed are the merciful for they shall obtain mercy."  Jesus

Women who have abortions should be punished...Donald Trump
The unborn person doesn't have constitutional rights...Hillary Clinton.

"Blessed are the pure of heart for they shall see God."..Jesus

Honesty is for Chumps...Donald Trump

"Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called the children of God."...Jesus

I'm really good at war...Donald Trump

"Blessed are they who are persecuted for the sake of righteousness for theirs is the Kindom of Heaven.Jesus

It's a vast right wing conspiracy...Hillary Clinton
U.S. district judge is Mexican and a hater...Donald Trump

I'll say this. Of all the presidential nominees we've ever had. These are two of em.

 I personally will vote for Hillary. Not because I think she's a good person. But, because I think she will be better suited to run the nation. That's a personal opinion and you don't have to agree for me to respect you. But, if you're voting for Trump because some numb nut evangelist tells you that he's with the party of god "GOP" then yeah, I think that's pretty stupid. I hate it when conservatives or liberals claim Jesus as their defense. If you really  followed Jesus. If I really followed Jesus then we would give half of what we make to the poor and give California back to Mexico. Do I think we should? Hell No! But, then again I don't think Jesus wrote the constitution and I don't vote based on a desire for a Theocracy. Will America survive or not?  Yes!
I do think the coming generations will be different. More diverse, less religious and I hope they find their spiritual guidance somehow. Other than that? Buckle up.


Tuesday, June 28, 2016

One of these Nights

One of These Nights  (1975)


I thought I’d take a step back from the political back and forth. The anger of politics, religion and even from gray hair and creeky joints. J Who knew there would come a day when playing a guitar would be painful. (No, I’m not talking about those that have to hear me) J I mean my joints and hands not being comfortable and having to stop in the middle of a song to get feeling back in my hand. So, this is a little memory lane trip. Back when I had long hair and no belly and though old age was something that only happened to old people. J


  This is the turning point of the Eagles. The old band was here. Henley, Frey, Leadon, Messiner along with Felder. This was the last of the classic Eagles and the preview of the band to come after when Joe Walsh and Timothy B. Scmidt replaced Leadon and Meissner.  I’ve often said the Eagles wrote the soundtrack of my youth.  I remember this one between my junior and senior years of high school.  I’m thinking about looking back at old albums and things from back in the day. I’m a natural introvert and sometimes as a social worker I have to step back from all the noise and drama. Not making light of other’s journey and experiences but sometimes the social worker needs a social worker. A counselor. I find mine in meditation, prayer and sometimes by gazing into my own belly button.  J So, here’s my thoughts and memories from a time in my misspent youth.


I spent most of my money and time on Wine, women and song. The rest I wasted…J .Paraphrase of an old quote.


1.    One of These Nights: Now, I can’t tell you what the boys in the band were thinking as they cranked out this throwback to Witchy Woman sounding song. I can tell you what I remember of my own thoughts about it. I was young and full of teenage angst. I was still pretty sure that “one of these nights” the girl I wanted would magically be mine. I was still torn between the romantic notion of “trew luv” and the lust of my youth. J

2.    Too Many Hands: A little faster and a little more convoluted. I could read into whatever I needed to read at the time from this one.

3.    Hollywood Watlz: I really like this  one. Easy to play on an acoustic guitar. Also, the theme of love once given never, being taken back.

4.    Journey of the Sorcerer: Really good instrumental. Starts off slow and then speeds up to a cool finish.

5.    Lyin’ Eyes: Classic Country Crossover: Faded love and memories of the one that got away. You can almost see the girl as she regrets some of the decisions made and longed for better times.

6.    Take It To The Limit: Beer soaked nights and sobering up to the neon sign of the next bar. Wondering if “She” might of loved me if things were a little different.

7.    Visions: Fast paced and of course it’s kind of introverted in it’s own way. After all visions are always personal.

8.    After the Thrill is gone: See Lyin’ Eyes and faded love.

9.    I wish You Peace: Soft little collaboration between Bernie Leadon and Patti Davis his then girlfriend and daughter of a future president of the United States. Nice thoughts and I remember listening to the warm lyrics on a cold winters night.


So there’s my review of one of the albums of my youth. It’s not the best album of all time. Not the absolute favorite of mine. But, it is one of my favorites if just because it’s an Eagles album and the particular time in my life I came to it.


I wish you Peace. J

Friday, June 24, 2016

My Happy Place

My Happy Place:

Dear God,

I’ve seen so much anger lately. People saying their your children (and I’m not saying their not.) wanting to deport little brown kids and their parents for having the audacity to try to get to a better place than the one their from. People using intimidation and cursing on one hand and then listing “Come worship with us on the other.” People yelling at each other over the best narccisst to elect and how everybody else is killing the country.  People hating a president and belittling but yet giving a free pass to the one’s who took us into war and the edge of depression. People telling me although they don’t know my life that I have had “privilege” just for the color of my skin. Yet, my journey isn’t one that many of them would have chosen or even made  it through.  People tailgating on the road because they are in such a hurry. People proclaiming you as an old angry man with a stick up his butt and then wondering why some us don’t have any desire to come to church to worship such a being. People claiming that all we are is a brain fart and then trying to find comfort in nothingness. You can put lipstick on a corpse but it’s still a corpse. I want off.


Just for a little while. I want to see and talk and breathe with Jesus. NO, not that one. Not the blue eyed all American Franklin Graham U.S. Constitution flag waving fraud. Not that one. See the other one? Over there? Palestinian?  Jew? Human? Yeah that one.

The one who weeps with the hurting and rejoices with the joyful. Yeah, that one. The one with the growth of beard and the dark weathered skin and the world weary eyes  that still sparkle somehow. The one with the rough hands that are so gentle when I take them. Yeah, that one. The one going into the cancer ward and weeping and wiping away tears. You know the one. The one who takes me through the times when I just feel like giving up. The one that doesn’t care if I yell @#$#$%#&!  The one who is sitting beside that dirty homeless man over there that I don’t even want to look at in case something jumps off him onto me. Yeah, that Jesus. Just for a minute.

See? Here’s a nice spot. Let’s sit here a little while. Want some more tea? It’s a hot one. I miss so much these days. Sometimes, I  think I need to go back to about 1975. I feel like I left something on one of those hot Alabama black top roads. I can’t really recognize the old guy in the mirror these days. But, every once in a while I see a certain glint of the eye.

Let’s stay just a little longer. Ya know? I don’t much care for religion these days. I don’t much care  for dogma and people yelling at each other when they don’t and can’t understand what it’s like to be the other person. But, I’ve missed you. I really have. Just a little longer.  That shade feels good. I think I’ll be okay but when I get to the place where I cross the river. Don’t forget me. In my own way I’ve never forgotten you.

Monday, June 20, 2016

Thoughts and Rants.

What you have done to the least of these. You have done to me…..Jesus

So now our choices are down to a cruel idiotic bully and a narcissist jerk that got a young girls rapist off by taking the girl down. Now, one was recent and one was long ago. But, both speak so much to the character and quality of these two “candidates.”  Trump is too chicken s..t to admit he made fun of a disabled reporter. Although, the “video” is there. At least be a man you piece of ….Oh well, I digress

Hillary says she had “No choice” and tried to get out of it way back in 1975. Still she chuckled about it as recently as a few months ago and her defenders saying it was taken out of context? Oh good gravy.


There’s no way now for you to get the Democratic or Republican nomination without being able to raise two or three hundred million dollars, or more, and I would not be inclined to do that. And I would not be capable of doing it.

“We’ve become now an oligarchy instead of a democracy. And I think that’s been the worst damage to the basic moral and ethical standards of the American political system that I’ve ever seen in my life.”


So, what’s the point in voting? Honestly? I’m not sure. But realistically? Given that we have to choose one. I’ll have to vote for the narcissistic  heir to the throne with apologies to King George. Because if you have lived and watched names such as Kennedy, Bush, Romney, Clinton and countless politicians on the local, state and federal level going into the “family business.” Then you have to know that we do indeed have political Royalty in this nation.

But, if I’m in an airplane and I have to choose between bad people then I have to at least choose the one with the pilot’s license. That would be Hillary. It’s a shame that she will now be thought of as the pioneer who broke through the glass ceiling for women. Because, honestly there are many, many better women than her.


COURIC: And when it comes to establishing your world view, I was curious, what newspapers and magazines did you regularly read before you were tapped for this—to stay informed and to understand the world?

PALIN: I've read most of them again with a great appreciation for the press, for the media, coming f—

COURIC: But like which ones specifically? I'm curious that you—

PALIN: Um, all of 'em, any of 'em that, um, have, have been in front of me over all these years. Um, I have a va—

COURIC: Can you name a few?

PALIN: I have a vast variety of sources where we get our news too. Alaska isn't a foreign country, where, it's kind of suggested and it seems like, 'Wow, how could you keep in touch with what the rest of Washington, D.C. may be thinking and doing when you live up there in Alaska?' Believe me, Alaska is like a microcosm of America.[10]


So, no not her. Not Sarah “Oh, I read em all.” Palin. I still haven’t forgiven John MCcain for foisting that intellectual moron on the nation. Has it been hard for me to take the G.O.P. and MCain in particular serious since then as far as national elections? You Betcha.


I remember when I worked for Etowah County in Gadsden, Alabama. A county Commissioner ran on being “pro life.” Really:? A COUNTY COMMISSIONER. I don’t think fixing potholes will have a real impact on the right to life debate. That’s how much respect these folks have for the voters. It’s as if a governor ran a campaign and had no clue as to how he or she was going to lead. But, just kept saying “I’m against Obama.” I mean how smart would you be to elect an imbecile like….Oh, Never Mind. Roll Tide and War Eagle y’all.


I really think we need term limits. But, on the other hand maybe this is what the majority really want for themselves. I have watched my home state gut education and social services. Hospitals facing possible closure. Industry going across state lines. But, ya know what? At least “we” showed Obama. Sheesh!


I could go on and on and offer quick fixes. But,  I really don’t have any. The only thing I can say is we need to hold all politicians accountable and stop being manipulated like football or basketball fans for a sports team. Stop thinking that these people are “godly” or have integrity or honesty. These are bought and paid for political whores and we need to stop the worship of them. Make them work for the money. Ya know what? A soldier “serves.” A firefighter “serves.” A police officer or a nurse or even a …Blushing here, social worker can serve. But, the next time I hear a rich @#$%$ politician named Bush, or Clinton or any other elected official say they serve? Well, lets just say I’ll try not to throw up in my own mouth. Sheesh!

So, yeah I’ll vote for Hillary. But, not because I think she’s a hero or has a servants heart. But, because I think the G.O.P. has lost its collective mind and at least the democrats will listen. But, that’s my opinion. Everybody has to follow their own heart. But, I’ll have to vote for my wallet and since I’m not independently wealthy I can’t vote G.O.P. Well that and the fact that Donald Trump is about as much a conservative republican as Mickey Mouse is. 

Anyway, that’s my rant. As always. I could be wrong.


Tuesday, June 14, 2016

Comfortably Numb

 I realized that I just didn't have the energy for another sound bite post on facebook. I  don't have the energy for another "just so" story from the right or the left. For the record I believe that we need to calm down and talk with each other instead of at each other. I do lean left. I do take the words of Jesus seriously when he says "whatever we do to the least of these." But, I also know that everybody has a life experience and an opinion. I've seen only a couple of truly evil people in my 59 years on this planet. Most people are conflicted. Most people are decent at their core but they are also afraid of people who are different. Anyway, right now as far as politics and religion and hate and violence. I'm just tired. Trying to get to the end of this part of my eternal journey without doing too much more damage to my own soul and none to anybody else's.

Is there anybody in there?
Just nod if you can hear me.
Is there anyone at home?

Another shooting. Another reason to hate Obama, Hillary, The N.R.A. White men, Muslims, Christians. Just depends on which channel you happen to be tuning in at the moment.


Come on, now,
I hear you're feeling down.
Well I can ease your pain
Get you on your feet again.


Well, I can vent it all on facebook. Listen, I know the truth. Listen this is what we should do. Get rid of all the guns. That will shore up the human heart quite nicely. If you don’t agree we can send you to a sensitivity class.  This is what we need to do. Take all the people that don’t look “American” and put them in camps and take the heads of families and ship them to a top secret “facility somewhere.” Wait a minute! Lets get religious fanatics out of the public eye. Wait a minute. Lets get the bible back in schools. Why, we used to know how to ….Wait a minute. Listen up. $#%#@


I'll need some information first.
Just the basic facts.
Can you show me where it hurts?


Ya know if they would just pull their damn pants up and ….Wait a minute if the old white men would just shut up and admit they are the reason for all the racism and hate in the world. Why you…@#$%$


There is no pain you are receding
A distant ship, smoke on the horizon.
You are only coming through in waves.
Your lips move but I can't hear what you're saying.


It’s judgement is what it is. Why, I remember when I was a child….Wait a minute. You can’t tell me anything. I just read a study the other day that shows that people “like you” are closed minded. So, I  don’t need to hear anything you have to say. What? I’ll tell you what you …@#$%$#


When I was a child I had a fever
My hands felt just like two balloons.
Now I've got that feeling once again
I can't explain you would not understand
This is not how I am.
I have become comfortably numb.


I’m going to binge watch that series again today. It speaks to me…It explains all the evils of the system man. You gotta see it…..I’m telling you that he was a great evangelist son and if you will stand with him then all of “those” people will be destroyed in god’s wrath. I know because I sent in a $300 love donation and I have the pendant to prove it…..What? well  on public radio the other day I heard from a very well respected scientist that the only reason you think you have a feeling is because a certain section of your brain is being sent a signal. What? On whose authority? Why you #$%$# On God’s authority. What? You can’t question me on that. I told you it’s Science!


Just a little pinprick.
There'll be no more aaaaaaaaah!
But you may feel a little sick.
Can you stand up?


Well, yeah we might have stolen it from the heathens but ya know god was on our side. Besides what were they doing with it? It was just growing up and trees were taking over….Well, I don’t need to respect anything you have because ya know that California and Texas belonged to “my people” first…Well if they had of been obeying nature. All’s I’m saying is it’s a plot to take away our guns man…


I do believe it's working, good.
That'll keep you going through the show
Come on it's time to go.


Well, what I’m saying is if we could seal up our borders….Well wait a minute are you going to shoot people for trying to better their life? That’s a little girl over there. You think you could shoot her for coming across the border?  Why you…..@#$%$#&. I’m voting for him because he is going to make them build that wall and pay for it. ….What? F.B.I.? She’s not worried about the F.B.I. Are you some kind of racist? Why would you ask that? Why you…#$%@&


There is no pain you are receding
A distant ship, smoke on the horizon.
You are only coming through in waves.
Your lips move but I can't hear what you're saying.


I know people died and people are hurting. But, the message is important. We can agree on that can’t we? Hush here they come. I gotta get this point across. It’s important! What? I can’t hear you. But, I did hear my political party leader say…


When I was a child
I caught a fleeting glimpse
Out of the corner of my eye.
I turned to look but it was gone
I cannot put my finger on it now
The child is grown,
The dream is gone.
I have become comfortably numb



Hey look at this. See this proves that it’s “them” that are causing all the problems.  I was just on my “group’s” facebook page and some idiot came in to troll. Man we let him have it. We all agreed that he/she is an idiot. By the way let me show you this post on youtube. I just found it.

I have become comfortably numb….Pink Floyd




I was hungry and you gave me nothing to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me nothing to drink, 43 I was a stranger and you did not invite me in, I needed clothes and you did not clothe me, I was sick and in prison and you did not look after me.’

44 “They also will answer, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or needing clothes or sick or in prison, and did not help you?’

45 “He will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did not do for one of the least of these, you did not do for me.’

Monday, May 30, 2016

Coffee With Jesus

 There's a site called Radio Free Babylon and that is where I "borrowed" the Coffee With Jesus title from. Anyway, I got up early this morning and decided to have "coffee with Jesus." So, I got my "Dark Tower Mug." which has the "Go, then there are other worlds than these" inscription. Made my coffee and headed for my pickup in the yard where I could chill and roll down the window before it gets to hot and talk out loud without the neighbors hearing me and assuming I'm getting even more screwy in my old age. :-) So, here's a little of what we talked about:

 For all of the literalist folks out there (Christians, Atheist, Agnostics and Skeptics) who do me the honor of reading my meanderings let me say this. No, I don't think I am writing a new scripture or making up my "inspired path to God." No, I don't think a physical flesh and blood person was sitting in the seat beside me (although, I did look over a time or two.) :-) Yes, I do believe I was drinking coffee and communicating with the very source of my being.

Me: "You know I was raised to believe you were literally the Son of God." That under your robe might as well have been a big "S" for Superman because you orchestrated the whole thing and could have called 'Ten thousand Angels" if you had wanted and would have been rescued from the cross.

Jesus: Uh, huh.

Me: I will say this though. When I was going through my recent patch of rough times the bible verses from my youth meant everything to me. I remembered them and held on to several and prayed them back to you. I didn't become a fundamentalist or anything but I held on to the wisdom of my lifetime. So far.

Jesus: And how did that make you feel?
Me: Just kidding. He, didn't say that. Jesus isn't a social worker. I just couldn't resist a little inside social work joke. :-)

Me: So, I'm not as sure of what I literally believe these days about reality. I find the whole "we are just brain farts and chemical reactions" of modern science jargon to be utterly depressing. On the other hand I find the "angry, sky god who want's us to walk around with a stick up our butts judging others as well as ourselves as nothing but unworthy worms to be very unlikely.

Me: I'm not even sure of what I'll see when I finish out my journey or transition to the next step of the journey. It wouldn't surprise me if you are physical manifestation of God. On the other hand it won't surprise me if you are purely spirit and not the "historical" flesh and blood just so character of my Sunday School classes.

Jesus: You recall the "The Wild God."

Me: I do. I was really young and happened to pick up a newspaper article. In those days I was either looking for the comics or the sports pages. But, I also loved to read about the strange and ghostly and I of course was a bible belt kid  from the south. So, the article called "The Wild God." caught my eye.

Jesus: Words and stories and truth and attempts to define even with the words "he, she, it, even source."

Me: Yeah, their all right and their all wrong.

Me: I don't know for sure. But, I think it's an eternal journey. Live this life and learn a little science, theology, love and hate. Peach and anxiety. Patience. Then take a little of the puzzle with you. The ever changing puzzle and continue to "Be."

Jesus: You already have the wisdom if you just knew how to listen, and see. The kingdom is within you. Not "up there" or "down here.

Me: The next part of this journey will be wonderful and sad and hard and peaceful and it will be okay.

Jesus: Enjoy the coffee and smell and see the world. But, don't get so attached that you lose the truth.

Me: All things serve the beam. :-) "Gotta be a Dark Tower reader to get that one.

Jesus: That sense of humor?  It's served you well. But, just don't forget who gave that to you. :-)

Me: Tears and laughter. Thank you God.

Me: Thank you for this. I hope to hear you better and see you in all the stages. I'm going to step on out there and try to flow with the universe. But, there are some (when are there not?) rocks and hills to navigate.

Jesus: I got ya.