Morning Meditation

 Just sit. No agenda.

Jesus and morning coffee

 

Do you believe in an afterlife?" The gunslinger asked him as Brown dropped three ears of corn onto his plate. Brown nodded. "I think this is it." ....Stephen King "The Gunslinger."

Me: Well Jesus to start the morning I woke up from kind of negative dreams of vaguely remembering someone doing some action in a relationship they didn't really feel like doing. Not being real. Then I opened up facebook. An Alabama fan football site came up with a negative post about the team and coaching staff. Then I reloaded and one of my spiritual seeker groups came up and the first thing I saw was a picture of an infamous atheist debunker and a quote from him. Then I go to X or the site formerly known as Twitter and a whole discussion of a snarky "reporter" trashing people who research the odd things in life comes up. Oh yeah, and I did pause in the middle of this early morning and asked for guidance and wisdom in a meditative/prayerful moment. Also, I looked out the door and instead of bright sunshine it looked like a rainy dreary day was cooking.

Thinking, reading and repeating statements of truth with deep attention will help to clear away negation...Paramahansa Yogananda

Jesus: So what do you feel about it? Doomed? Depressed? Distraught?

Me: No, not really any of those. I think the universe is trying to tell me something but I'm not really sure what to do about it.

Jesus: Listen! Breathe and ask deep inside yourself what is going on. What are the deepest issues you struggle with right now?

Me: My inner life. As I get older my body has twitches and aches and stumbles that it didn't use to have. My mind wanders and I find myself brutally honest when I look at religion and politics but still deflecting when I look at my own inner life.

Sign, sign everywhere a sign. Blockin' out the scenery breakin my mind...Signs by The Five Man Electrical Band.

Jesus: Legend and stories and popes and organizations and even translations of stories from 2 to 6000 years old make people judge the thoughts of others. People worship politics and divide over skin tone and accents and who has the most toys. Distraction and coloring hair and blurring photos on social media and trying so hard to hold on to things that never "belonged" to them in the first place. Propping up a political system that cares more about spending money to drop bombs than feeding, clothing and housing its own population. I can see where you might be a little stressed.

Me: Are you mad?

Jesus: I'm not the one going to hell. Laughs. "Gotta love Seinfeld."

Me: Tell the boss where  I get my sense of humor next time you see him.

People cannot see anything that truly is without becoming like it. "Gnostic Gospel of Phillip."

Jesus: But seriously. I walked where you are walking now. I woke up in the same skin everyday. It's not easy being human. Wrapped up in the NOW as if only the present comfort means anything and everything else is somewhere in the far future or the distant past.

Me: Isn't that a paradox? I mean you seem to be saying "live now" but also saying don't make decisions and fret about a moment that is passing before you even finish the next sentence.

Jesus: Yes.

Me: Oh great! That clears it up  then.

Jesus: Laughs.

Me: My inner life is as calm as it's ever been but my calmness is kind of based on being old  and realizing that I can't start a new job or make more money or afford a vacation. So I might as well be calm and watch my body deteriorate and hope for the best.

Jesus: You know better than that. You live at a time where medical science can give you a better quality of life than any other time in history. That's the good part. But just as you see people trying to present themselves as still looking like they are 25 instead of 65 on social media you are trying to deny death. By doing that you are denying life.  Also, I'll tell you a secret. It's all life!

Today a young man on acid realized that all matter is merely energy...Bill Hicks.

"I know where I came from and where I'm  going." Jesus...John 8:14

Me: I intuit that from my journey. I AM is the name of God and I Am is where I come from. That's all I can ever be and I can never be less.

Jesus: Some things can't be put into words but  that's a start.

Me: So about  this dreary start  to the day. What should I do?

Even if your heart is breakin' It's waiting for you to awaken. Someday you will. Learn to be still...Eagles

Jesus: Listen. Watch and seek understanding. You're not doomed by physical events that are passing. Or because  the chemicals of your body are out of line or because some angry old man with a stick up his butt is angry at you from his distant throne. You're learning to be still. 

Me: So Jesus. Are you really there?

Jesus: Are you?

Me: I'm pretty certain I am. Although I don't really understand. I'm not the body but I crave the body. I'm not my hands or legs but I feel them. I'm not an organism in my head or a muscle in my chest. I'm me. I AM. But I don't really understand how to put myself in space and time.  For instance, I had surgery. The doctor cut my chest but I wasn't the chest. He repaired a problem in my heart or at least patched it up. But, I wasn't the heart. I owned or at least I use the heart to express my feelings here. I come from a biological birth and feel a connection with my mother who birthed me but I didn't simply pop into existence. I come from an ocean of being but I'm not the ocean I come from.

Jesus: Hmm. Sounds like you need to find yourself before you try to define if I'm really there or if there is a being on a throne somewhere or angels or demons. Sounds like you need to find yourself. If you find yourself then you will find that all the answers are there. Or maybe not. Who knows?

 

Me: Well I have  found one thing that keeps me going. The connection with the ocean of all that is, has been or will ever be. I AM. I feel that connection and the great cloud of witnesses who are a little ahead or a little behind me on the journey.

Jesus: Feel better?

Me: Well it doesn't feel like a "come to Jesus" moment. Pardon the pun. But, I feel like I need and want to stop and listen today for a still small voice.

Jesus: Or a smack upside the head.  "smiles."

Me: Okay. Let's continue the dance.

Today a young man on acid realized that all matter is really energy condensed to a slow vibration,that we are all one consciousness experiencing itself subjectively,there is no such thing as death. Life is only a dream, and we are the imagination of ourselves. Here's Tom with the weather...Bill Hicks.

Peace!